It's you. 

1. We have not been seeing each other for weeks; yet not asking me just a date/ meal? Not just some concern text? (Did I asked for too much?) All you can say is "concentrate on your exam" blah blah blah! ... Call you and ask you why nev msg me the whole day but msg in group chat. You said you wan me to concentrate n study so dun wan to disturb me. To me is like wtf? Go out do some errand also nev tell me. All you say you got a lot of things to do n tired. Fuck? I'm your gf; I nev ask you keep on msg me or wat; just fork out some seconds/minutes to call/text me what u do/go today also tired? All you concern only yourself tired ? 

Think you used to it le right. Cos I'm always soft to you. I need some attention you know ? 

I lost your attention during your exam; I can understand; but u already finished? Sigh can you be the one who can be understanding BF ? And ask yourself "why I being like this?"

2. And also regarding your solo trip w that lady. If MINDEF never reject your leave; will you really go w her? You keep on say you and her nothing happen but it's hurts me a lot ? Is not that I don't trust you. Is you never concern about my feeling. Only you and yourself. 

3. Cos you not ready. 你让我动摇。

Been tgt so many years yet you not ready? Even we tgt in the next few years also not ready? 

But u asked me to endure n concentrate on exam.

But why not you? 😓

Yah, I know it's your final exam. 

I can understand.

Been less msg n call each other. 

All I wanna or Dying to hear from you is ...

"I miss you" ; "thanks for being understanding"; or something sweet? 

Sigh. Am I not being understanding or are you being selfish/ being self center (love you n yourself ). 

PS: 

Love; trust; understanding 

These words NOT just place in your heart will do. 

You need to show out and let other party feel it. 

That's more important. 

But worsten it. 

Your reply was:

"why complain? You should change/ upgrade yourself. Do something that I won't .. ..... " 

Which actually not I wanna hear from you.

Sometimes I'm wondering; 

Why not you change an angle dun look down on me? 

Just b cos u highly educated; n I'm not. 

So u feel confident in yourself den me? You trust yourself den me.

(When I'm feel confident in myself; you break my confident😔)

Although my eng is F9; but I have 8yrs experience in writing. 

Dun base on my F9 can? 😔

I don't mind other ppl look down on me; but not you. Sigh 

Idk how to express it; 

All I complain just to let you know; 

hoping you can change an angle dun look down on me or change ur attitude towards me; and trust me when I'm really confidence in something. 

But idk why everytime it turn out to be my fault again 😔

I tot I was a simple girl;

but it's seem that I'm not. 😔

Lesson learnt: 

don't complain anything to him in future;

Once you complain/ said out your unhappy; he won't comfort you; he will just say what can you do? Change ? Etc? N quarrel begin. 😪

Don't wanna quarrel ? 

DEN DONT COMPLAIN! 

I tot he won't 让步；but this time he seem to be different.

He don't wish me to unhappy; he dun wanna go for the trip w the girl. 

Kinda surprise he did that. 

But sigh! I let him chase his dream despite of he go on a trip w the girl 😪

ONLY THIS TIME!

I'm kinda disappointed when he said I can't make it if I climb mountain w him. 

Sigh. 

But overall. 

This is the last time.

Hopefully I can endure during his SOLO trip w her 😔

This time I dream that : 

I saw a lot of fb post ppl getting their BTO flats n propose etc. 

And so I asked/ told him.

He told me was.. .... 

"I would wanna settle down with you but I wanna slow it down" 

After I heard "slow it down" ; I woke up from my dream or Shld I say nightmares. 

In reality; wat will he say to me. 

I'm really curious.. 

Wanna asked but I scared the ans is not I wanna hear ~~ 

Mmmmmmmm.